I chatted on the phone with a friend this morning. I’ve know this friend for 10 years (whoa! 10 years went fast!), we’ve been pregnant at the same time twice and had our first borns within weeks of each other. We know each other very well and tend to be very honest with each other… even the ugly honest.
As I was relating what I had done with my time since we had last seen each other, she stopped me to tell me that she was surprised at how much socializing I had done. She then quickly followed it up with a comment that for her, that would be a dream to have that much social time, but she knew it wore me out. And I am really am. I had a crazy busy weekend: lots of talking and spending time with people. This week wasn’t initially better for me, but I actually breathed a sigh of relief when the fevers showed up and I knew I would have to clear our week.
Growing up, I can remember looking at my parents’ calendar and wondering when the day would come where I would be able to stay home for the evening. Because I was homeschooled, I was able to keep to a relatively peaceful daytime schedule, but all those after school activities sure add up… they look great on a college application, but when you are a type who needs quiet to recharge, you wonder if it’s even worth it.
All my life, I have come up with excuses to not attend an event. When Matt and I got married, I tried my hand at hosting events at our home… I thought if I ran the helm, I’d like parties more. Because I am an organized person, things always went well… but oh my gosh, I couldn’t stand to even talk to someone for three days after all the chaos left my house. Happy chaos, good chaos, funny chaos; it still drains me.
I happened upon the book – Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking and actually devoured it. It was so freeing to read through why I need quiet. WHY I need a break from social events and crave the quiet. If you’re in the same boat, I strongly recommend it! Our society celebrates the loud and busy and if you don’t celebrate it too, well… people think you’re odd. I’ve been watching Gilmore Girls on Netflix while I sew and I’m really appreciating how they wrote the character of Rory. I understand why she plans a whole weekend of aloneness. I plan whole weekends of aloneness. It’s awesome.
The best part was that I actually live in a house full of introverted homebodies. And it’s amazing. I don’t know what I’d do if my children were the types who wanted to go and do every single day. Instead I get the chance to nurture our little family… to help my children learn their own limits and then respect them. Instead of pressuring them to participate beyond their comfort in the socially acceptable busy that is everywhere, I get to show them how to have a life that while quiet, is fulfilling and successful!